Never again... My perspective on things I've put behind me....

It's Friday, and so it's time for another Thought Tale hour at the Henderson's.  This week, I experienced the final labor pains of a process that has gone anything BUT the way I anticipated.  It has left me mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted - no - exhausted doesn't quite cover it.  It has left me obliterated.  Even as I consider sharing it with you, the sound of it is so simple.  One of my children owned a home here in our town, and he was transferred to another city.  I agreed to become the "Landlord" and help keep everything organized while he considered selling the home.  How difficult could this be?  Suffice it to say, this experience of being a Landlord will now be added to a rather pointed list of 'Things I will NEVER do again...'.  Oh, and for the record, selling the home was twice as hard as managing it.  So, like wearing a two piece and walking on the beach - hear ye, hear ye - me and real estate are DONE. Drop a marble in the bowl.

It's the bigger picture that gets you sucked into some things, right?

So to be clear, I will always do anything to support our kids - short of breaking any major laws - and that would probably also be negotiable.  As I reviewed the "I'll never again" list, I see some things on there that were initially done on someone else's behalf.  But that's probably why having a list like this, in writing, is a good thing.  You need to be able to pull it out and refer to it so you can explain to the other party that this is a deal breaker, sorry.  

This week's lesson, once completed,  brought to mind another cemented 'never again' decision I've made, as I navigated the waters of business dealings and mediation.  There are times you just can't choose who you do business with - who you sell your house to, who does repairs for you, who legally represents you - but you can choose who you work for.  Who is at the top of the feeding chain in the company that provides a paycheck to you?  Do you have respect for them and their business practices?  Do they subscribe to some kind of moral tenet that you can admire?  At least twice in my life, I have worked for someone that proved to be not only a self serving individual, but a person I would never wish to be associated with, in any way.  I'm now tied to them forever via my resume.  Yuck.

It's a beautiful thing to be representing a business organization that provides a valuable service, and whose top leadership looks to the pool of employees as being a vital part of their success.  It  puts an extra spring in your step as you do your job.  I left the horror of this morning's real estate transaction and went to serve someone who needs a hand, and I got paid for doing it.  You need these fresh air moments in the times when you experience a 'never again' moment, don't you?

What about the adage, 'never say never...'?

My nearly 55 years has provided me with plenty of experiences that were repetitive mistakes, or things that I swore I'd NEVER do again - like cleaning toilets in a public restroom as part of my job - but these deal breakers are more pronounced,  and usually not something you don't have an option to consider before undertaking.  These are things that you,  for the most part,  can totally control.  They are not rise above moments: When you do something for another or when you have no choice.  There is always a choice in these decisions, and the ball's in your court.  

Case in point.  I have had times in my life where I found myself in the proposed middle of two parties, both whom I loved, trying to stay at peace with each.  All the while, with the full realization that one of the parties was not only wrong, but being downright cruel in their behavior.  Before you say, "oh never would I allow that", consider that they both might be close family members, or a boss and a co-worker, or a couple of old friends. I recently realized that this, for me, is one of my 'never again' experiences.  I had to stand up to one party and say, "Enough", which caused our relationship to be severed.  I did not do the severing, the other party just decided that their belief was more important than either I or the others involved.  As I came to terms with this, I saw that I had only been avoiding the inevitable for months.  I will never allow someone I love to be mistreated and not stand up to the one mistreating them, regardless of who they are.  Even if the one I'm protecting doesn't appreciate it, I will know, and that's enough. 

I should never wait til Friday to write my Friday Thought tale post....

It's been one hell of a week, but the lessons have been many and will continue to germinate.  Had I finished this yesterday, I would not be feeling the full weight of the conviction I am putting behind these words.  So tonight, we will toast to putting yet another 'never again' behind us, as we drink the Champagne that was meant for the buyers of the house.  I dropped a little grenadine in it and added some salt - blood, sweat and tears...  Yeah, I'll never again reward chicanery.  But I will look on the brightside for my son - no more mortgage due to a debt paid in full.  And that's something I'm happy to be a part of.  CHEERS FRIENDS!
P.S.  A special shout out to our Realtor, Angela, and her supports - Katelyn, Kristall and Jillyan.  Thanks Angela for always being on our side, and never making us feel alone.