A Joyous Perspective on living life: If it's not fun, you're not doing it right.

This week, the Thought Tale Hour comes to you from the beautiful new home of my children in sunny Huntington Beach California. During this busy week of chasing after two energetic toddlers, I have been reminded of a great life lesson we folks over 20-something have a tendency to forget. When this element is taken from daily life over too long of a period, leaves one looking grim and smelling stale. And while it's easy to assume it has to be provided with an opportunity that we can join in, it's really something that you ignite from within. I'm talking about a little word that can pack a punch when used correctly: FUN.

A short trip off a long pier.

This idea was demonstrated to me early in my week, as

I was walking along the Pier in Huntington Beach. I'm watching for traffic and trying to figure out where we are according to the map. My toddler grandson is chattering away about the waves and the Seagulls on the wall ahead. Gleefully paying no mind at all to where we were, just that we were going somewhere together.
I noticed that an older gentleman, amused by my toddler, was watching him with a smile on his face. As he walked by us, he chuckled to himself, “Children have all the fun!”

He’s right. They do. And in my quest to 'be responsible' and 'in control', apparently I am missing out. My age is no good reason for me not to have fun. In fact, I should be more expert at it as I get older. But instead, we seem to wring it slowly out of our lives as we mosey down the path of adulthood. 

Spending alone time with my grandchildren reminds me of something important. We are born with a complete understanding of fun, which seems to fade over time and conditioning. You probably have people in your life that you recall or know have a particular penchant for making things fun, or always seemingly having fun. The ones that I am considering are those that allowed this part of themselves to fade somehow. Is it possible to retrieve it back or revive it? Can we be 'grown ups' and also be 'fun-loving'?

Is it a noun or a verb?

It occurs to me that fun is a perspective.  It’s not an idea bound within the walls of an amusement park. The days that I remember this, it makes all the difference. I find myself often saying this to other adults, "Have fun." More often than not, I get a smirk back or a sarcastic, "Right." But I do mean it. It's my small attempt to shift their perspective on whatever lies ahead.

No matter what state you find yourself in right now, a sense of fun begins with light. The brightest kind of light. Sunshine. Some of us don't get a lot of this stuff in the next parts of the year. So I would encourage you to get out and find some children. Because children are sunshine. Sunshine on little legs.

Because the sunshine is what they see.

They have no concept of worrying about the future and living up to responsibilities or overwhelming to-do lists. They feel no embarrassment in falling over, getting it wrong, or showing anyone exactly how they feel. Every day brings discoveries, wonder, and excitement. Every day is new. They’re always way too caught up in the fun to even think about the consequences. They laugh with every inch of their bodies until they hurt, and they still keep smiling. There’s a word that sums up all of these characteristics …Fun-loving.

And when they do these things, we adults don't stop them and say, 'Hey, grow up!' Or 'Get hold of yourself!'. We chuckle with them. Have you stopped giggling? Then it's time to get back your fun.

Imagine brimming with joyful expectation rather than a million worries. Being pleased with everything you’ve said and done instead of regretting forever. Replacing fear of what the day might bring to being too excited to wait and see. We can learn a tremendous lesson from our mini-experts on life. I certainly have. Keeping them around us is vital to a life capable of finding the fun in its existence. And they don't just have to be those who are young regarding age, as I have found out. They can be those who are devoid of the routine part of aging due to their unique circumstances.

You don’t need to be childish to be childlike. You can find happiness in everyday routine. Here are just a few points I threw together this week between blowing bubbles and answering the question "Why?" a million times. A few suggestions for how to put fun into everyday life:

 Be where you are.

Kids are magnificent at enjoying the moment. Adults become addicted to thinking about all the things we have to do tonight, tomorrow, next week. Where you are is where the fun is. Nowhere else. Right here, right now.

Learn something new.

From new words to new facial expressions, kids are constantly mastering new skills. Make it a point to continuously be learning something, anything. Aren’t we the ones who tell our children that “learning is fun”? Live by example.

 Get out of your comfort zone.

As I was often reminded this week, toddlers take risks all day long. As we mature, we tend to stay in our safe place. Your day will be so much more exciting if you gather the guts to wear hot pink pants or those purple polka dotted shoes.

 Smile 27 times more than you do.

I’ve heard that children smile 400 times a day and adults, only 15. Smiling is the catalyst to having fun. Exercise those facial muscles.

 Notice nature

Every child is in awe of ants, birds, and dandelions. At some point, we become creatures of the concrete jungle. Allow yourself to be enamored by Mother Nature. "Look, there's a pink bug!" 

Use your imagination.

A child can get lost in their make-believe world for hours. Imagine riding an elephant in Thailand. Or running a marathon on the Great Wall of China. You’ll have so much fun pretending that you might want to make it reality, which leads to more fun than you can imagine.

 Be unpredictable.

There is no knowing what a kid will get up to next. Step out of your ordinary routine and you’ll be surprised at how liberated you’ll feel.

Slow down.

Children know how to take their sweet time. Allow yourself enough time to enjoy living. Rushing sucks all the fun out of the day.

Create.

Paint, draw, build, write. Kids enthusiastically enjoy those activities. Fun is being in your creative element.

 Get dirty.

Kids aren’t afraid to experience life up front and personally. Get right in there. Make sandcastles. Sit in the wet and muddy grass. Roll in the hay.

Break the rules.

The fun doesn’t follow all the rules. Neither do kids. If it doesn’t hurt, go for it! Leave those lovely Christmas lights up year-round. Turn them on a few times. It's fun.

Resist the flat line.

And the last and most important way to open your life up to more fun is to stop worrying so much about all that you cannot control. Children are happy because they don't have a file in their head called all the things that could go wrong. At dinner this week, my son and I were discussing the concept of just living life in survival mode - coping- vs. living life with expansion - progressing. Fun breaks you out of the flat line. It's like the air that fills your lungs with laughter fills your soul with buoyant possibilities.

How can you take the first step toward feeling that free? With one small, child-like action at a time. Run with the ideas below that jump out at you. Skip into some more when you’re ready. My hope for you is to have happy times. To breathe. To dance. To laugh so hard that you physically shake.

Re-discover your sunshine… 

Even if you don't live in it right now, you can feel it from the inside if you just allow yourself to have a little fun. As I finish this post off, I have my grandson sitting on my lap. And as I was about to write the last line, he got right in front of my face and exclaimed, "Gramma, you're funny!" Ah, validation from one of my balls of sunshine. So tonight, I'll be toasting with some of my favorite people drinking something warm by a bonfire on the beach. Having a great deal of fun. CHEERS, FRIENDS!