A Joyous Perspective on The Holidays: Don't forget not to 'over' season the season...

Here's a repost and a reminder... Cheers!

It's Friday, and time for another Thought-Tale Hour at the Henderson's. A couple of days ago, Chris called me as I was driving along and said, "Oh honey, I forgot to tell you something...". His voice sounded pensive and made me push my ear even closer to the phone. "What's up?", I quickly asked. "We are doing something at work this year for the food drive, and I need to bring some fudge Monday....", his voice trailed off, waiting for my response. My heart raced a little. So it begins. The Holiday Season. Gone would be my weekends with  Netflix marathons - see you in January. Time to start making lists and checking them twice, perusing Pinterest, angsting over Amazon, orchestrating the offspring... "WHOA Nellie, what the heck* (*edited for a wider audience) are you doing Joy?!  Who made you the Official Conductor of Christmas?".... I breathed in deeply. Time to roll it back and remember your roots before you start decorating with withering leaves.

It's not all about the getting, or even the giving.

Like many baby boomer families with millennial

Eddy, our expert photo bomber.

Offspring, we have begun to feel like the actual meaning of the holiday season can get lost in all the 'stuff' that collects around our Tree (or Festivus Pole, or Menorah, or whatever). And with a growing grandchild population, we risk training these little ones up with a skewed understanding of what these celebrations are indeed all about. Tearing open the gifts, even when you attempt to slow it down and make it meaningful, only lasts a few minutes. Then they observe their parent cursing how full the car is, and where in the world are we going to put all of this crap? 

There's something wrong with this picture. A few years ago, we implemented a few new traditions that have helped, like drawing names, encouraging a meaningful gift vs. high priced ones, and asking that each person gives the gift of sharing a little about the person they are honoring.  This year, we will add a little more to this 'refocusing' the holiday's thought. It's been a journey for me, as I'm the one who loves to overdo. You start to think that somehow, everyone expects it to be a certain way, and how in the world can you 'let them down'? Life has a way of teaching us if we open ourselves to let it, doesn't it?

Hold tightly to the things that will last.

It's a long story...

The Holidays quite literally paused for me a few years ago. 2008, the year we lost our son Seth. I recall that for the first time in my life not even feeling like acknowledging Christmas that year after sucking up everything within me to have Thanksgiving at our home. Fate seemed to shine on me, and I ended up having a major surgery just before Christmas day, which landed me in the hospital during the holidays. I had no choice but to sit that one out...Literally. Our family spent a quiet holiday that year, just determining to try and not bring down anyone else's joy. 

But then, as it does, time rolled on and then came the next Holiday Season, and I resolved to find a way to bring back the joy of the season while not forgetting those not present. A dear friend, Betty Scott, told me of an idea involving a Memory Candle Lighting that another family had done. Everyone in the family brings a candle to represent themselves to surround one candle that represented the loved one lost. This idea 

Niko is making sure it is just right.

Resonated with me, and so with the support of our kids, we did it. Not only was it a beautiful memory, enhanced by our first Christmas with Niko and Terra, but it seemed to release us all to have an enjoyable and laughter filled time together. We've done it every year since. And this week, as my mind began to swirl out of control, my saner self-brought me back to this memory and the significance behind it. If this were my last holiday season, this is one mom-ism tradition I believe would carry on.  And that makes me smile

Time to check the seasoning.

So tonight, as we prepare for a weekend of seasoning, we stop to remind ourselves, and those of you who are reading this, that all of your unique traditions are like spice that should enhance our lives, not overwhelm them. Let's not allow ourselves to 'over-season' the Season.  The Gingerbread might get burned; the Fudge is not set up, or you might miss a day of the Elf on the

Christmas 2014

Shelf. Your gravy may end up on the kitchen floor, but these are the pieces of THIS holiday season that will stand as part of your story forever, so don't let them tell the whole story.  Find the things that bring you together and never let them get lost in the noise.  We will be drinking Salted Caramel Caucasians tonight, as we toast to memorable 2015. 'Seasonings Greetings' to all! CHEERS, FRIENDS!




Joy's Salted Caramel Caucasian**

1 oz Van Gogh Dutch Chocolate Vodka
1/2 oz of Salted Caramel Kahlua
Half and Half to taste
Sea Salt  and caramel topping for garnish


Fill a tall glass with crushed ice. Add vodka and Kahlua, and then fill to top with half and half. Stir carefully. Sprinkle salt on top and ribbon with caramel. 

**Always drink responsibly. Never drive after drinking.