A Joyous Perspective on Freedom: When You Own It and You Know It.

It's Friday, so it must be time for another Friday Night Thought Tale Hour with the Hendersons. Here in the United States, we are getting ready for a long weekend.


The day we celebrate our independence falls on a Tuesday this year, so many of us will just make a small vacation out of it. But this year has an exceptional added meaning for me, and I thought about it a lot this week. I have been working on owning more freedom in my life over the past few years, and I am really starting to feel its results. It made me want to share with others a few things I've learned about finding more freedom in your life. And the first one is, you have to want to be free.

Being trapped can feel more comfortable than being free.

Life can feel like a severe tornado that is bearing down on you sometimes. You might have found an issue that is keeping you bound and unhappy to be a shelter of sorts. While you don't like the limitations, you understand them, and there are no risks involved in remaining within them that you don't actually believe you can't handle. Yes, people observe you down in your basement of the bummer and look upon you with pity. You smile weakly or perhaps scowl defiantly back. Soon they've moved on, and you are left to imagine how good it might feel to be out of that dark place. If only... Maybe one of them says something that resonates, or you read something that gives you a new idea. Oh no... Now what?

With any knowledge comes an option to use it.

You may think that you are far from being a prisoner to that thing you struggle with, but if you feel pulled toward it at all, take heed. I have a dear friend who was sharing with me recently how she had started counting calories. I meant it with all sincerity when I asked why in the world she was doing this, as she was far from being overweight or unhealthy from my external view. "I watched a few episodes of 'My 600 lb. Life'. I could only look at a few. It was too horrible. But it made me realize that I did not have a good control over how I was using food and nutrition in my life. So I decided to start paying attention." Like my friend, you more than likely have all the knowledge you need to make a change. No one can make you use that understanding and take back your power. You have to retake it yourself. Exercise your option to use your power.

If you say you don't want to start over, then why do you keep giving up?

I've decided I really don't trust the industries around us who have become powerful by using the word 'Program' in a way that I think is intended to keep you a prisoner to it. Anything that says in so many days or weeks it can free you or get you where you need to be is filled with people who are repeating it again and again. The problem is, any 'program' might take you

to a place where you appear to be free, but then what? Hopefully, you're going to live past that 90 days or 6 months. What will you do with the rest of your life?

A 'system' created to help you regain control and remain in control is a better option.

A good system is like flying a kite. Check out my joyous perspective on finding the right system for you:

1. You get your kite ready and make sure you've got room to run. You don't know how long it's going to take to get airborne so plan accordingly.
2. Make sure you are ready to put your full energies into the initial steps. Don't be tired or unsure. If you are not ready, wait.
3. Run right into the wind, not with it. You have to face some resistance to get airborne.
4. Let go slowly, make sure you have a good hold on the kite, and it's not going to crash straight down. If it starts too, back off a little, wait until it's steady.
5. Once it's airborne and going, slowly release more string. Let the wind guide you. Pay attention, don't become a kite flying robot. Find what feels right and don't take your eyes off of the kite.
6. Keep it up. Keep it steady. Enjoy it.
   

   

P.S., You are the kite in this simulation.

Your system has got to become habitual, just like your issue has become. Even if you decide to take a minute to catch a breath and adjust, that is still not stopping in the sense that you have given up.

Do you have a personal 'Declaration of Independence'?

I had one that I adopted from the million and a half health programs I had been a part of in my life. I knew it couldn't be about a particular goal because that would just be a reason to stop once I arrived there. I would just adapt until I could give myself permission to become unadapted. I knew that everything I did today had to get me to where I wanted to be tomorrow. So my daily declaration is, "I will never again weigh more than what I do today." Now I know what you're saying "Body weight fluctuates and you can't talk like that..." Yes, I held onto that science until it got me up to almost 350lbs. Remember, you have to own your declaration. This one speaks to me, and it motivates me to align each of my daily activities with behaviors that will support it. Much like our own U.S. Declaration of Independence, it is not a literal statement, but more like a guide. And I also hold my truth to be self-evident. Do you? You need to form a guide to activate your journey and help you through the unavoidable: The setback.

It's not the setbacks that you have to beware of - it's how you respond to each one.

There is nothing linear about healing. It's a rough and tumble trip of hills and curves, rocks and sand. Your kite will nearly take more than one nosedive. Adjust, don't drop the spool and walk away.

Are you ready to own it, and let nothing take it from you?

The good stuff comes when you love how you feel more than you miss what you gave up to be here. No more ground for you. You are free to fly, as long as you decide you want to. If your thing is a physical challenge, just know this - the real battle is in mind. Guard your thoughts carefully. Keep your declaration of independence close. Own it.

Your mind is not a sublet. It is yours to fill and yours to manage.

So tonight, Chris and I will be kicking off a wonderful extended holiday with a toast to independence with a "Stars and Stripes Shooter" chased with Prosecco. I love these little red, white and blue shots, they make me feel all patriotic and warm. But they also symbolize freedom that was hard fought for and requires attention or we'll lose it. Here's to you finding a new sense of independence in your life, and becoming an owner of it in every way. Cheers, Friends!

Joy's Stars and Stripes Shooter***

In a shot glass layer evenly:

Grenadine
Rum Chatta
Blue Curacao

The Rum and Curacao will blend a bit. Those are the stars. Cheers.

***Always drink responsibly.